2 months

Well....Today is 2 months since the accident...It is so hard to believe that we have gone two months without seeing or talking to Shane. He has not been a physical part of our lives for that long....Wow it is crazy! It is so hard to believe that he will no longer be here. I have begun reading this book by Nicholas Sparks and a man talks about months after his wife died a friend asked him how it felt to loose his wife. He replied that he didn't know because to him it just felt like she was gone for the weekend but would be coming back any day now....This is how I feel, that Shane just went away for a little while but that he will be back soon...

Only 2 months ago he was alive and going throughout any old day. Two months ago from right now he was at Truman, working, doing his thing. He had no idea that it would be his last day, and of course neither did any of us.

A weird thing happened last night, but I find this significant since it occurred on the morning of this day. Well it is very seldom that I have a good nights rest, usually I toss and turn and wake up on several occasions. Last night was one of those, I woke up so many times and don't know why. But the weird thing happened this morning when I woke myself up by talking. You know how when you are dreaming something and you say a line of your dream out loud and wake yourself up. This is kind of how it happened, except that I don't remember dreaming a thing. All I know is that I rolled over and said "Shane," just so casually as if I was in the room with him about to start a conversation with him. Almost as soon as I said it I was awake and realized what I had said. It is just crazy, and this may have no meaning, it is just ironic to me that it happened on the day of two months and odd that I don't remember dreaming about him at all...